droptheious | Deerington inbox

Deerington inbox

FROM:

SUBJECT:

	FERN	Ooo slang part the second
	FERN	i think we just shared electrons, because i'm feeling a covalent bond between us
	LANCE	Pidge, I need your help. I gotta send a meme to Chloe but ...
	DIPPER	Hey Varian. You know those crazy alchemy bombs you used...
	PETER	Hey Varian, this is Peter. Um, Peter Graham.
	USAGI	Soooooooo~ How'd the date go?
	MAKO	Varian— Checking in.
	SHIRO	i think one of us put a chicken patty in my toaster
	EDDIE	Hey. We need to talk.
	MELIUS	𝐻𝒾. 𝐼 𝓀𝓃𝑜𝓌 𝒾𝓉 𝓁𝑜𝑜𝓀𝓈 𝓌𝑒𝒾𝓇𝒹 𝒶𝓃𝒹 𝒾𝓉 𝒾𝓈 𝓃𝑜𝓉 𝓈𝒽𝑜𝓇𝓉
	EDA	Hey, kid. I... owe you an apology.
	LUZ	Valentines
	MAUL	I have a proposition for a project I think you'll be interested in
	USAGI	I LOVE YOU
	FERN	DUDE you still have your bandana!
	BUZZ	Morning. I heard from Fern you wanted to go out into the blizzard.
	FERN	dude your profile changed
	USAGI	Ruby told me about the breakup.
	GLITCH	Varian, I'm gonna go live somewhere else for now
	MAKO	A "nerd" is somebody smart...
	MAUL	Gifts
	FERN	heeyyyy quick question
	FERN	Christmas is coming up!!!
	CHLOE	god who the FUCK ever thought emojis were a good idea???
	KRISTOFF	Varian,It's getting colder so I thought you could use this
	FERN	heyyyy Variable
	RAPUNZEL	okay not to put you on the spot but...
	EDA	Potion time
	NEO	Dude, I can mine antidote shit here!
	GLITCH	Got this in my basket.
	EDA	hey smart kid
	TEN	Hallo
	ADAM	Hey, k-- uh, Varian. I just wanted to check in
	USAGI	I'm sorry I worried you and fainted on you yesterday.
	AMARA	i lived, bitch
	NEO	Debatably good news, asshole
	USAGI	Hey Varian! It's Usagi
	OSCAR	I'm sorry, Varian. Tell me what you need
	FERN	a dark past huh
	MAUL	Varian. I am in great need of your assistance
	FERN	Varian VARIAN I CAN EAT FOOD
	USAGI	How much moon essence do you have?
	USAGI	VIVI-KUN, VIVI-KUN GUESS WHAT GUESS WHAT!
	RICHIE	well I promised
	FERN	A TOTALLY INCOMPLETE LIST OF OOO WORDS 'N SLANG
	GLITCH	VARIAN ARE THERE BUGS IN THE WATER?!
	USAGI	To help with restless nights and the...
	VIRA-LORR	Little alchemist. I have a gift for you.
	MARTIN	Hi, Varian. This is Martin. I wanted to reach out...
	USAGI	Hi Varian, sweetie! I have a question for you.
	GLITCH	varian I need to talk to you. it's important.
	USAGI	I need you not to panic after what I tell you.
	FERN	dog you have so many vests
	IRONHIDE	HONK HONK
	USAGI	... I'm sorry I couldn't help you better, Varian
	EMERALD	Hey, V. Not that I care that much or anything...
	FERN	tell me when you're alive
	FERN	Varian i stabbed two people
	AMARA	hey weirdo i have something for you
	FERN	is the Rapunzel in town your Rapunzel?
	PENNY	Salutations!! You do not know me, but my name is Penny Polendina
	YANG	Hey, is this Varian? I think we've met once before.
	FERN	hey can we talk
	FERN	you told ruby
	MAUL	Surviving another year is always an occasion worth celebrating
	USAGI	Hey I wanted to apologise
	USAGI	VARIAN-KUUUUNNN!!!!
	FERN	birth
	MAUL	Look what just arrived for me.
	KATHERINE	Do you want to get paid to make more purple goo things?
	FERN	ok i know you're good with plants but what about animals
	FERN	dog interested in means girls or guys

TO:

SUBJECT:

	USAGI	So. Maul dropped by, he's got his memories back.
	ADAM	I'm worried about Shiro
	FERN	Hey handsome
	OSCAR	You've been weirdly quiet lately
	FERN	Guess what I haven't told you lately?
	USAGI	Hey. I'm back from the dead and I feel like trash.
	FERN	I made meatloaf that may or may not poison us!
	Emerald	Hey. I know you probably don't want to talk to anyone right now...
	BELLA	Hey Bella. You've dated someone who's a different species to you right?
	BILL	Hi, Fern mentioned you were interested in interdimensional portals...
	FERN	Aw, your pictures are nice!
	KURT	Hey. Are you around?
	RICHIE	Is it just me or is Eddie acting weirder than usual?
	QROW	Hey. Checking up on you.
	EDA	Hi Eda. Hope Ruddiger found you okay.
	GLITCH	Hey. What happened between you and Maul?
	LUNA	Luna- I uh... I think I need your help
	EDDIE	So hey, I finally worked out how to replicate the Antidote
	OSCAR	So, I noticed Ozpin has shown up.
	ROGUE	Hey, I managed to replicate the Antidote
	KURT	Hey. We're back. None of us are dead.
	QROW	Uh... hey. How are you guys holding up?
	PETER	You gave Ruby the haunted dolls
	GLITCH	Hey, Bud. Sorry I tried to murder you with a robot
	KURT	I'm probably the last person you want to talk to...
	JON	I'm sorry I attacked you
	JON	Stay away from Fern.
	FERN	Hey you still haven't got me those baking ingredients
	FERN	Okay so the Betties are upping their war...
	USAGI	Hey. So. Update.
	NEO	You tried to bury her alive? SERIOUSLY?
	USAGI	Emotions are really difficult
	FERN	OH MY GOD YOU HAVE ONE TOO
	FERN	Okay this better be to Fern this time.
	WYNONNA	So guess who got into the fridge and ate literally everything in there.

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cawaii

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They neighbors had better appreciate the effort we put into sprucing this street up.

[And their property values plummeting.

She fumbles around with her response to that. There's a lot of "..."'s popping up and leaving his screen. Instead she focuses on the important part of all this.]

Wait. You had one that you didn't show me? No fair!

[Nailed it.]

I think they'd appreciate it as much as the farm.

[Which is to say, probably not at all. But whatever, their loss. He kind of stares at those little "..."'s for a while and oh no don't ask him this, Ruby. This is only going to make things more awkward.]

It's really awkward. Just warning you now. Let it be noted that I tried to protect you from this.

Varian and Ruby haven't kissed yet. Each time Varian sees Ruby they think to themselves 'I've gotta do it this time' but they keep being too shy to do anything. One day a friend asks Varian if Ruby has ever tried to kiss them and Varian just screams.

We're really hoping the farm will catch on.

[Gosh. Wow. That is a whole of trying to tell them that they should kiss or something. She's glad to toss her face back in her pillow because that's her new safe space. It's like a cushy turtle shell of protection against awkward.

Eventually she'll respond.]

I

That is to say

I

Haven't tried???

Yet?????

Wait no.

Not yet.

At all.

Unless you wanted to?????????????

Uh. WAIT LET'S TRY A NEW ONE!

Ruby serenades Varian with a New Year's kazoo/squawker/party horn.

[The universe is mocking them and their awkwardness. That's clearly what's happening here. It's rude and he doesn't like it.]

I mean. Obviously I want to. It's just finding the right time? Is there a right time?

Forget I asked that I like the kazoo one better. I can picture that.

OhrightyeahthatswhatImeantsureyesIwanttotoowaitiwassupposedtoforgetyouaskedthatrightiforgotuhhhhsomeothertimesureyeah

Kazoos are awesome. I would be awesome at playing one. I'll start practicing.

Edited 2020-05-27 22:59 (UTC)

[Ah, Ruby has once again lost a fight with a space bar, he sees. Give him a second to decipher this.]

Uh. Right. Yes. I... too want to do that. At some point. Yes. Very much so.

["I too want to do that?" Oh noooo that's too ye olde times even for him. He's just gonna go... rest his head gently on his workbench for a moment and pray for death.]

I wonder how much practise it takes to play the kazoo? I mean, I can play the piano and the tambourine and I'll give you a wild guess which one is easier.

Sure. Great. Yeah. Someday.

[Just handling this like a champ.]

Pretty sure it's the piano, obviously.

That was a joke.

I can probably play the kazoo, but I have to actually learn the song or whatever that I'm going to play for my big debut.

Great. Glad we could get that ironed out.

[Kids, it's a kiss, not a business transaction, come on.]

Darn it and I was hoping you'd guess tambourine.

What song are you going to play, out of curiosity?

Phew! Yeah. That's a thing that'll happen sometime.

I can't always be the the clueless one. Just most of the time :>

I'm not sure. I kind of liked that one you sent me before. Maybe that.

Absolutely. Look forward to it.

[Oh god, why did he type that? Nnnnooooo.]

Hey now, you're not clueless at all.

That's a pretty good song. I'm sure it would be magical via kazoo. I could definitely be wooed by it is what I'm saying.

Right. Great time that'll be! See you then!

[FREAKIN' NAILED IT.]

I am at least a little clueless.

Good to know! We'll have to make sure there's a couch near by that you faint into if that's the case. I'll have to find a couple others just to keep it original.

[50% chance one of them is Skater Boy.]

[Good job kids!]

I feel like agreeing with you might be dangerous for me so I'm keeping my "no you're not" stance.

I will absolutely need a fainting couch prepped for all the swooning.

[Please serenade him with Skater Boy on the kazoo, Ruby. That's highest tier romance, right there. ]

At least my knowledge of modern music is still depressingly slim. The chances of you finding something I haven't heard yet are astronomically high.

Sounds good. It would be super awkward to explain all the blood.

This reminds me, we should go to like the furniture store sometime and check out if they have anything comfy in there. You game?

[It's coming.]

Don't worry about it. We don't have a lot of this music where I'm from either. The styles are pretty close though which is surprising.

And Ruddiger would probably swear vengance on your or something.

Okay, I guess I could use something in the house that's less... sparse. Even if only like... three people ever come here.

That's pretty cool. Have you found any other carry-overs between Earth and Remnant? I have to admit, I wouldn't have expected a lot of overlap, but I guess humans are humans whatever world they're in, right?

I could never hurt Ruddiger like that.
...I also don't need another person or cute animal in this case swearing vengeance on me.
...And also like hurting you is not high on my priority list.
...But this was mostly a joke and now I'm explaining it.

Three people are still people! You've gotta have something cozy in the house.

Our buildings and such are pretty similar. At least what I've seen in books kind of carries over between one another. I'm surprised we didn't end up doing things completely different in some ways. It's just weird how alike we are in some ways but other ways it's like how does this even work?

It's okay, Rube. Just joke was loud and clear. But thanks for the reassurance, it means a lot :)

I guess a couch or a comfortable chair or two wouldn't be the WORST thing. Maybe something nice for the porch?

I'm not sure. Your culture started off very differently, and obviously things like grimm and dust and selmblences have to have some effect on your day-to-day. But some of it does seem to follow the same beat. And it's common enough that people from all kinds of different worlds seem to be the same. I guess society has one really strong blueprint to work from and it sticks to that, just diverting course here and there when it needs to.

Just making sure.
I would hate to have Ruddiger for an enemy.
I can't fight something that cute.

OMG YES. WE NEED TO GET ONE OF THOSE SWINGY COUCH THINGS FOR YOUR PORCH. IT WOULD REALLY GO WITH THE BOOBY TRAPS.

That kind of makes sense. I mean even for humanities second time around in my world there were similarities between their take on our world and what I grew up with. We could all be drawn to the same things.

He IS pretty hard to fight when he's adorable. Shame I can't use the mutation serum on him here. He's way less cute then,

I'm not sure how a porch swing would go with the booby trap aesthetic, but sure. It might be nice. Maybe a little relaxing too.

[He's going to end up falling asleep on it, but at least he will achieve sleep!]

Exactly. It's pretty fascinating. I mean, I struggle with understanding how people work at the best of times- but the ancient cultures and how they all seem to stem from core values is pretty amazing.

He's practically unstoppable.
It is! I kind of wanna wrestle him when he's like that sometime!

Trust me. I'm an expert on things like this. They definitely go together. It's with you being from the olden days and stuff like that.

[And then one day they'll both fall asleep on it and it will be adorable.]

Maybe it means there is some sort of connection to all our worlds. Some way some how.

The gods did say our world was like a failed experiment. Maybe they picked up and started again somewhere else.

That doesn't surprise me. Not even for a tiny little second.

[She can't hear it, but he definitely lets out a soft, fond 'heh' at that. They will absolutely end up falling asleep on the thing and it'll be adorable. ]

Then I consider myself very lucky yo have you around to consult on all hip and cool modern-day things. Helping me navigate through my olden days confusion. Truly, you are a saint.

Maybe? I know we for sure have our own legend concerning light and dark magic. And how they are supposed to be joined together but split apart.

I fight monsters. You have to pick a career you're passionate about.

[This gently gets added to the to do list of things they have to do.]

Don't worry, gramps. I'm here for you. You'll be cool with all the young kids in no time, I promise.

That sounds vaguely familiar to my home... Or at least we had a God of Light and a God of Darkness. They're the ones who made our world.

We sort of have a representative for both at the moment.

Kind of.

Very true!

You're good to me. However can I ever repay you?

Ours were... are the Sundrop and the Moonstone. It's... really complicated and my world is in a lot of danger because the person who has control of the Moonstone is... well, she's on the warpath. She's got me locked in a cage right now- I mean, back in the waking world right now, using me as bait to get Rapunzel to come to her. Rapunzel has the power of the Sundrop, y'see. It's messy.

What are yours? As... representatives, I mean?

I don't know, Maybe a lab night? I have some extra equipment from the last order of guns I was working on. I bet we could make something cool with them.

[Ruby reads that over once or twice. The two of them tended to share of non specifics about their worlds, tidbits without actually getting into the details about what they were actually doing. It crushed a little to know he was in danger back at home. It hurt even more knowing there wasn't really anything she could to do help him there.]

That does sound complicated.
She's a capable girl though and you're not too shabby yourself.
I'm sure you'll both get you out of there.

It's kind of a tricky situation.
There are multiple things kind of playing a role some way or another.
Remember when I told you about Salem and Ozma the other month, during the rain?
Well... The Grimm. Salem has control over them and they were originally the creations of the God of Darkness.
Ozma-Or Ozpin as I knew him got his power to reincarnate from the God of Light.
Along with the Relics that are back at home. Well... I have one with me right now. Both here and in the waking world. I'm trying to get it to safety.

And I guess I fit in there somewhere too. My eyes are the same as the God of Light's. I'm not really sure how that works yet.

That'd be nice! I'd like that. I'm sure you could show me a thing or two.

[He considers his answer carefully. He's always very vague about Cass, he doesn't want her coming here and facing people thinking she's dangerous- not when she could be pulled at any point. Because, even after everything, he still desperately wants her to be able to find her way back to the light.]

Soon as I figure out how to get out of the cage over the two hundred foot drop without falling to a horrible, horrible death, I'll be fine. But Rapunzel has this. And the other person... well, I've not lost hope on her yet. She can come around.

Oh wow. So that's a lot. On something that was already A LOT. I met Oscar, by the way. On the subject of Ozpin. He told me about the whole living in his head thing. That's also a whole lot of terrible.

it doesn't sound like it's gonna get any easier for you guys any time soon, huh?

Who knows, maybe I'll even learn something.

[For as rough as Varian was on himself, Ruby couldn't help but admire the fact that he hadn't given up on whoever he was talking about. He was good people and she hoped he'd see that more in himself.]

Well if you that about here than I do too. Which means there are three people there watching your back. So I have more faith you'll make it out of there.

Ugh. It is. It's so much and it's so bad that I just don't understand how it got the way it is.

He did?

Oscar has had something awful forced on him that he doesn't deserve in the slightest. He's a good kid and I know he's trying best considering what has been put on his shoulders.

When I get home I have to find a way to help him too. It's on a long list of things I have to figure out when I get home but it's on there either way. I'm not going to let Ozpin just abandon him until whatever's happening to him runs it's course.

I'm not sure... I don't think so but I hope so. Everyone is from further along than I am. It sounds like everything is looking up from when I went to sleep, but that's only what's directly effecting us. ...We might be in better shape in the next few weeks depending on how things go.

I'm not sure. I haven't actually seen any of these things to know.

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