Deerington inbox

[droptheious]

FROM: SUBJECT: FERN Ooo slang part the second FERN i think we just shared electrons, because i'm feeling a covalent bond between us LANCE Pidge, I need your help. I gotta send a meme to Chloe but ... DIPPER Hey Varian. You know those crazy alchemy bombs you used... PETER Hey Varian, this is Peter. Um, Peter Graham. USAGI Soooooooo~ How'd the date go? MAKO Varian— Checking in. SHIRO i think one of us put a chicken patty in my toaster EDDIE Hey. We need to talk. MELIUS 𝐻𝒾. 𝐼 𝓀𝓃𝑜𝓌 𝒾𝓉 𝓁𝑜𝑜𝓀𝓈 𝓌𝑒𝒾𝓇𝒹 𝒶𝓃𝒹 𝒾𝓉 𝒾𝓈 𝓃𝑜𝓉 𝓈𝒽𝑜𝓇𝓉 EDA Hey, kid. I... owe you an apology. LUZ Valentines MAUL I have a proposition for a project I think you'll be interested in USAGI I LOVE YOU FERN DUDE you still have your bandana! BUZZ Morning. I heard from Fern you wanted to go out into the blizzard. FERN dude your profile changed USAGI Ruby told me about the breakup. GLITCH Varian, I'm gonna go live somewhere else for now MAKO A "nerd" is somebody smart... MAUL Gifts FERN heeyyyy quick question FERN Christmas is coming up!!! CHLOE god who the FUCK ever thought emojis were a good idea??? KRISTOFF Varian,It's getting colder so I thought you could use this FERN heyyyy Variable RAPUNZEL okay not to put you on the spot but... EDA Potion time NEO Dude, I can mine antidote shit here! GLITCH Got this in my basket. EDA hey smart kid TEN Hallo ADAM Hey, k-- uh, Varian. I just wanted to check in USAGI I'm sorry I worried you and fainted on you yesterday. AMARA i lived, bitch NEO Debatably good news, asshole USAGI Hey Varian! It's Usagi OSCAR I'm sorry, Varian. Tell me what you need FERN a dark past huh MAUL Varian. I am in great need of your assistance FERN Varian VARIAN I CAN EAT FOOD USAGI How much moon essence do you have? USAGI VIVI-KUN, VIVI-KUN GUESS WHAT GUESS WHAT! RICHIE well I promised FERN A TOTALLY INCOMPLETE LIST OF OOO WORDS 'N SLANG GLITCH VARIAN ARE THERE BUGS IN THE WATER?! USAGI To help with restless nights and the... VIRA-LORR Little alchemist. I have a gift for you. MARTIN Hi, Varian. This is Martin. I wanted to reach out... USAGI Hi Varian, sweetie! I have a question for you. GLITCH varian I need to talk to you. it's important. USAGI I need you not to panic after what I tell you. FERN dog you have so many vests IRONHIDE HONK HONK USAGI ... I'm sorry I couldn't help you better, Varian EMERALD Hey, V. Not that I care that much or anything... FERN tell me when you're alive FERN Varian i stabbed two people AMARA hey weirdo i have something for you FERN is the Rapunzel in town your Rapunzel? PENNY Salutations!! You do not know me, but my name is Penny Polendina YANG Hey, is this Varian? I think we've met once before. FERN hey can we talk FERN you told ruby MAUL Surviving another year is always an occasion worth celebrating USAGI Hey I wanted to apologise USAGI VARIAN-KUUUUNNN!!!! FERN birth MAUL Look what just arrived for me. KATHERINE Do you want to get paid to make more purple goo things? FERN ok i know you're good with plants but what about animals FERN dog interested in means girls or guys

TO: SUBJECT: USAGI So. Maul dropped by, he's got his memories back. ADAM I'm worried about Shiro FERN Hey handsome OSCAR You've been weirdly quiet lately FERN Guess what I haven't told you lately? USAGI Hey. I'm back from the dead and I feel like trash. FERN I made meatloaf that may or may not poison us! Emerald Hey. I know you probably don't want to talk to anyone right now... BELLA Hey Bella. You've dated someone who's a different species to you right? BILL Hi, Fern mentioned you were interested in interdimensional portals... FERN Aw, your pictures are nice! KURT Hey. Are you around? RICHIE Is it just me or is Eddie acting weirder than usual? QROW Hey. Checking up on you. EDA Hi Eda. Hope Ruddiger found you okay. GLITCH Hey. What happened between you and Maul? LUNA Luna- I uh... I think I need your help EDDIE So hey, I finally worked out how to replicate the Antidote OSCAR So, I noticed Ozpin has shown up. ROGUE Hey, I managed to replicate the Antidote KURT Hey. We're back. None of us are dead. QROW Uh... hey. How are you guys holding up? PETER You gave Ruby the haunted dolls GLITCH Hey, Bud. Sorry I tried to murder you with a robot KURT I'm probably the last person you want to talk to... JON I'm sorry I attacked you JON Stay away from Fern. FERN Hey you still haven't got me those baking ingredients FERN Okay so the Betties are upping their war... USAGI Hey. So. Update. NEO You tried to bury her alive? SERIOUSLY? USAGI Emotions are really difficult FERN OH MY GOD YOU HAVE ONE TOO FERN Okay this better be to Fern this time. WYNONNA So guess who got into the fridge and ate literally everything in there.

code by cawaii

Comments

text; un: fern

[laminae]

[Not long after this conversation....]

you told Ruby
you lied to me

text: un: trienemybest

[droptheious]

[You now, he'd been kind of hinging this on the vain hope that Ruby wouldn't talk to Fern. He's made it clear he doesn't like her, she had no need to reach out.

But of course, Ruby is Ruby and he should have seen this coming. Damnit, Ruby, you could have been an asshole this once. ]

Only because I knew you wouldn't react well to it. [That's... not helping.] Okay, fine. I told Ruby, I went to hers the night you died because staying home and letting my grief fester didn't work out so well for me last time.

Would it have made you feel any better to know the truth there and then?

[laminae]

[Fern doesn't respond right away. As stupid as it is, he'd been vainly hoping Varian's answer would be no, that this was all a big misunderstanding and that things aren't as bad as he thinks they are. It's one thing to only have told one person he cares about that he died, it's another for Varian to have turned around and, that night, told someone that he hated. And then lie about it.]

yes
at least you wouldn't have been lying to me
guess this is my fault for thinking we're friends

[droptheious]

[In hindsight, the lying part was probably the worst misstep. He'd kind of expected this sort of reaction from Fern, but he's surprised that it still hurt a lot to read those words.]

That's not fair. Of course we're friends. You're probably the best friend I've had in... ever.

But I guess I failed spectacularly in showing that. I'm sorry. I made a wrong call. I never wanted to actually hurt you, I've been trying to do the opposite. But again, failing spectacularly.

[laminae]

i don't know if i can believe you

[He wants to, he really wants to, but everything he's heard forces doubt to creep into his mind.]

you didn't even try to tell anyone i care about
but you turned around and told someone you care about the first day
someone you know i hate and would never want knowing what happened
and then you lied to me about it

as soon as i get inconvenient you run off to Ruby
you're probably gonna do that once i hang up no matter what i say

we aren't friends, i'm just a way for you to avoid being bored

[droptheious]

I told you why I didn't tell them. I told you I freaked out and I made a mistake. If I could go back and change that, I would. But I can't.

I didn't go to Ruby to spite you. I went to Ruby because she's my friend and I'd just killed one of the most important people to me in this place. I didn't know that to do and being home alone made everything-

I didn't trust myself to be alone with just the thoughts in my head. So I went to Ruby, because she's important to me too. I know you hate her, but I don't. And she helped- it wasn't about getting at you. It was about not letting my grief eat me alive. Again.

[He wanted honesty, and there it was. The last time he was left alone in his grief, he tried to raze a kingdom to the ground. It was self-preservation. Or maybe preservation of this place. Either or. ]

That's not true. You mean a lot to me Fern. You're the first person I ever talked about my past to. Heck, you're the only person here who GETS it. I don't hang around with you to avoid being bored. You're the person who understands me better than anyone- here or home. You matter to me.

Believe what you like. But that's the truth.

[laminae]

oh duh
how could i forget that she's such a good friend
forget everything i just said, because she's a good friend and that's all that matters
thanks for reminding me

[Because that's all he's seeing right now, another reminder that she's like Finn. Always and forever better than him.]

i THOUGHT all of that was true
but for all i know you're just lying again

i'm done
i don't know if we ever were friends
but we aren't now

[droptheious]

What? How did you get ANY of that from what I just said? You know I can have multiple friends, right? It's not a competition. I don't RANK you guys.

[He can feel that old, bitter anger filling in around the hurt. The same one he felt when he thought Rapunzel had betrayed him. It was partly his fault then, too, but the pain feels the same regardless.]

You know what? Fine. I told you the truth, it's up to you if you want to believe me or not. You're not the first person to turn their back on me for my mistakes and you won't be the last. I just never expected it to come from you.

[Serves him right for thinking anyone could look beyond that. Sure serves him right. ]

[laminae]

[A reasonable person would understand this, that this whole idea of friendship with Varian being a competition is total nonsense. That that isn't how friendship in general works.

But that isn't how Fern's mind works. Every mention of Ruby being a good person feels like a stab against him, reinforcement that he isn't like that, and can never hope to be that kind of person again. He isn't anywhere near as good as she is, and that's why Varian listens to her over him.

There's a ranking. Varian is either just lying or in denial, and whether or not it's malicious doesn't matter. It still hurts, just like it does when he reads the continued texts. 'You're not the first person to turn their back on me.'

That draws up a sick feeling in him, like he's abandoning Varian. But he isn't, right? Varian's the one who is wrong here. Varian is the one who doesn't care.

He keeps repeating that thought in his mind, but his hands are still shaking as he types up a response.]

fine
you can believe whatever you want too
i've got nothing else to say to you

[droptheious]

[There's a part of Varian that wants to keep going- because he's really bad at letting things go and tends to keep shovelling even after he's hit rock bottom. He really wants to rant and rave and make Fern understand that this hurts. That no matter what he believes, he still matters to him. A lot.

But he doesn't. For once, he puts down the shovel and heaves out a breath. That protective wall of his slams right back up. Fine. Same old dance, just a different partner. Fine. ]

Keep Ruddiger around for a few days. He'll help you out while you're still sick.

[trienemybest is offline]