droptheious | Deerington inbox

Deerington inbox

FROM:

SUBJECT:

	FERN	Ooo slang part the second
	FERN	i think we just shared electrons, because i'm feeling a covalent bond between us
	LANCE	Pidge, I need your help. I gotta send a meme to Chloe but ...
	DIPPER	Hey Varian. You know those crazy alchemy bombs you used...
	PETER	Hey Varian, this is Peter. Um, Peter Graham.
	USAGI	Soooooooo~ How'd the date go?
	MAKO	Varian— Checking in.
	SHIRO	i think one of us put a chicken patty in my toaster
	EDDIE	Hey. We need to talk.
	MELIUS	𝐻𝒾. 𝐼 𝓀𝓃𝑜𝓌 𝒾𝓉 𝓁𝑜𝑜𝓀𝓈 𝓌𝑒𝒾𝓇𝒹 𝒶𝓃𝒹 𝒾𝓉 𝒾𝓈 𝓃𝑜𝓉 𝓈𝒽𝑜𝓇𝓉
	EDA	Hey, kid. I... owe you an apology.
	LUZ	Valentines
	MAUL	I have a proposition for a project I think you'll be interested in
	USAGI	I LOVE YOU
	FERN	DUDE you still have your bandana!
	BUZZ	Morning. I heard from Fern you wanted to go out into the blizzard.
	FERN	dude your profile changed
	USAGI	Ruby told me about the breakup.
	GLITCH	Varian, I'm gonna go live somewhere else for now
	MAKO	A "nerd" is somebody smart...
	MAUL	Gifts
	FERN	heeyyyy quick question
	FERN	Christmas is coming up!!!
	CHLOE	god who the FUCK ever thought emojis were a good idea???
	KRISTOFF	Varian,It's getting colder so I thought you could use this
	FERN	heyyyy Variable
	RAPUNZEL	okay not to put you on the spot but...
	EDA	Potion time
	NEO	Dude, I can mine antidote shit here!
	GLITCH	Got this in my basket.
	EDA	hey smart kid
	TEN	Hallo
	ADAM	Hey, k-- uh, Varian. I just wanted to check in
	USAGI	I'm sorry I worried you and fainted on you yesterday.
	AMARA	i lived, bitch
	NEO	Debatably good news, asshole
	USAGI	Hey Varian! It's Usagi
	OSCAR	I'm sorry, Varian. Tell me what you need
	FERN	a dark past huh
	MAUL	Varian. I am in great need of your assistance
	FERN	Varian VARIAN I CAN EAT FOOD
	USAGI	How much moon essence do you have?
	USAGI	VIVI-KUN, VIVI-KUN GUESS WHAT GUESS WHAT!
	RICHIE	well I promised
	FERN	A TOTALLY INCOMPLETE LIST OF OOO WORDS 'N SLANG
	GLITCH	VARIAN ARE THERE BUGS IN THE WATER?!
	USAGI	To help with restless nights and the...
	VIRA-LORR	Little alchemist. I have a gift for you.
	MARTIN	Hi, Varian. This is Martin. I wanted to reach out...
	USAGI	Hi Varian, sweetie! I have a question for you.
	GLITCH	varian I need to talk to you. it's important.
	USAGI	I need you not to panic after what I tell you.
	FERN	dog you have so many vests
	IRONHIDE	HONK HONK
	USAGI	... I'm sorry I couldn't help you better, Varian
	EMERALD	Hey, V. Not that I care that much or anything...
	FERN	tell me when you're alive
	FERN	Varian i stabbed two people
	AMARA	hey weirdo i have something for you
	FERN	is the Rapunzel in town your Rapunzel?
	PENNY	Salutations!! You do not know me, but my name is Penny Polendina
	YANG	Hey, is this Varian? I think we've met once before.
	FERN	hey can we talk
	FERN	you told ruby
	MAUL	Surviving another year is always an occasion worth celebrating
	USAGI	Hey I wanted to apologise
	USAGI	VARIAN-KUUUUNNN!!!!
	FERN	birth
	MAUL	Look what just arrived for me.
	KATHERINE	Do you want to get paid to make more purple goo things?
	FERN	ok i know you're good with plants but what about animals
	FERN	dog interested in means girls or guys

TO:

SUBJECT:

	USAGI	So. Maul dropped by, he's got his memories back.
	ADAM	I'm worried about Shiro
	FERN	Hey handsome
	OSCAR	You've been weirdly quiet lately
	FERN	Guess what I haven't told you lately?
	USAGI	Hey. I'm back from the dead and I feel like trash.
	FERN	I made meatloaf that may or may not poison us!
	Emerald	Hey. I know you probably don't want to talk to anyone right now...
	BELLA	Hey Bella. You've dated someone who's a different species to you right?
	BILL	Hi, Fern mentioned you were interested in interdimensional portals...
	FERN	Aw, your pictures are nice!
	KURT	Hey. Are you around?
	RICHIE	Is it just me or is Eddie acting weirder than usual?
	QROW	Hey. Checking up on you.
	EDA	Hi Eda. Hope Ruddiger found you okay.
	GLITCH	Hey. What happened between you and Maul?
	LUNA	Luna- I uh... I think I need your help
	EDDIE	So hey, I finally worked out how to replicate the Antidote
	OSCAR	So, I noticed Ozpin has shown up.
	ROGUE	Hey, I managed to replicate the Antidote
	KURT	Hey. We're back. None of us are dead.
	QROW	Uh... hey. How are you guys holding up?
	PETER	You gave Ruby the haunted dolls
	GLITCH	Hey, Bud. Sorry I tried to murder you with a robot
	KURT	I'm probably the last person you want to talk to...
	JON	I'm sorry I attacked you
	JON	Stay away from Fern.
	FERN	Hey you still haven't got me those baking ingredients
	FERN	Okay so the Betties are upping their war...
	USAGI	Hey. So. Update.
	NEO	You tried to bury her alive? SERIOUSLY?
	USAGI	Emotions are really difficult
	FERN	OH MY GOD YOU HAVE ONE TOO
	FERN	Okay this better be to Fern this time.
	WYNONNA	So guess who got into the fridge and ate literally everything in there.

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[It's very hard to have faith in a person who is laughing like that. Still, he always has the utmost faith in Ruby, for better or for worse. ]

I'm holding you to that promise. Like. Life-bound promise right there.

[He looks over the edge and that's- okay it's terrifying but it's also amazing. Like being in a hot air balloon. Except... you know. For the drop they're teetering over.]

Huh, that is quite the view and- [and then the cart starts to move] oh and there's gravity!!!

[He's just going to (bravely) scream his poor little head off as the rollercoaster DROPS like a rock. And, you know. For the ride. Really. Lots of screaming. ]

[She could have started him off with some easy like a Ferris Wheel, something where they could actually enjoy the view before plummeting at high speeds down a track. She hadn't, she was throwing him right into the deep end with no regrets. She's kind of a monster.

When they hit the drop she's screaming too but it's less of a terrified scream and more out of excitement with a weird howling cackle mixed in there. She's having the time of her life while one arm grips the guard and the other grips Varian's shoulder. She's at least conscious that he's freaking out about this.

As if the drop and the high speeds and the twists and turns were not enough there's a couple big old loops that involve them going upside down coming up. Good luck with that Varian.]

[She is absolutely a monster, and yet he loves her anyway. He knows what he's getting into with her and her... adrenaline-junkie ways and he follows her all the same.

The grip on his shoulder id vaguely comforting. He'd probably be more comforted if they weren't hurtling towards certain fucking death and OH GOD WHAT IS WRONG WITH THE FUTURE WHY DO PEOPLE THINK THIS IS FUN?!!!!. Maybe after his feet are back on solid, blissful ground and his heart rate comes back to normal he can appreciate the science behind the loops.

But right now he's just going to continue his panicked screaming because that seems to be a perfectly reasonable coping mechanism thus far. ]

Edited 2020-06-26 20:05 (UTC)

[Ruby meanwhile is having the time of her life. It's all the fun of not zipping around at high speeds with none of the death that reaching those speeds in a fight usually gets her. She's pretty darn impressed that Varian has managed to stay conscious throughout all of this too.

He's a champ. That's for sure.

It's not too long after that the ride abruptly slows way the heck down, because that's super healthy once someone's velotized, right? And the cart shuffles them along the rest of the track until they come to a rough stop and the guard is raised back up.

Ruby let's out a cheer and shakes Varian shoulder a with excitement.]

Wasn't that amazing!?

[Did she even notice all the screaming?]

[He's a champ. He's a winner. The cart jerks to a stop and it's only that the guard rail raised that Varian released his death grip on it. It's a shame he went through all that effort to actually try and brush his hair for once, because now it's back to looking like he's been dragged through a hedge backwards- without the goggles on top of his head to contain it, it's just going everywhere.

He's kind of having a thousand-yard stare for a moment. You might need to get him out of the cart, Ruby. He's fine. It's fine.]

I need a minute to get enough cognitive function to describe that unholy terror I just experienced.

[MAYBE amazing?]

[That's definitely a look he's got going on there now. Once Ruby realizes it doesn't look like he's going to be moving on his own she gives a sort of sympathetic giggle.]

Okay there, bud. You take your minute, I've got you.

[She leans over and just hauls him up over her shoulder like the little grape he is and starts to carry him out from the ride back out into the park. She starts looking around for a bench for them to take a seat at before they continue exploring.]

Unholy terror in a good way, right?

[He manages a soft 'urp' before he;s picked up and slung over her shoulder like he weighs nothing. He doesn't complain, though, it's fine, she can carry him anywhere she wants. And it does at least pull him out of his terror-stupor.]

Undecided on that one. I think I can see why you'd like it though. It's very... adrenaline pumping?

[He gives her back a little pat.]

I think I'm okay now. Able to use my legs and words and everything.

[Don't give her ideas Varian. She doesn't need those. She might have to fireman carry him the next time they go out for a run and he gets exhausted mid-way through.]

It is! It's almost like my semblance but less being a bunch of rose petals. It's a blast.

[Oh. She'll take pat and gently place him down on the ground. She'll even try to help with his now a crows nest of a hair do with her fingers. It's not much but she's trying??]

Good. Glad to have you back, captain.

Why don't we try and find something a little more your speed this time around?

[When his legs no longer work, he will appreciate this. Besides, the fact she can probably benchpress him is one of the things that gives him the heart flutters. He's got simple needs sometimes, and those needs happen to include a very strong girlfriend. ]

...Y-yeah, okay, sure. I can actually see that connection.

[He gives a lopsided smile at her brave attempt to fix his hair. Maybe it was the fact he legitimately thought he was going to die, maybe it was their sudden close proximity, or maybe it was that she'd just carted him around like he weighed nothing. It could well be it was a combination of all three. Regardless, the thought kiss her slips into his consciousness. It's not the first time he's thought that far from it- but his usual concoction of nerves and self-loathing usually put paid to such thoughts.

But he feels more than a little emboldened with all that adrenaline coursing through his system, so he leans up, pressing his lips against hers before the rest of his brain wakes up and turns against him. ]

[Ruby hadn't put much thought into what she was doing. She was just trying to help out after traumatizing her boyfriend. She was used to the adrenaline and the rush of speed from all of her battles. She however, was not used to being kissed.

When he leans in and his lips touch hers her silver eyes pop open wide with surprise and shock. There is a sudden fear as she has absolutely no idea what to do but it washes away quickly, replaced by a very warm and pleasant feeling that bubbles up from head to toes.

Her lips press back against his briefly and her hands take hold of his shoulders as her legs go wobbly and she tries to steady herself. It doesn't really work and instead she just kind of drags him down with her as she falls backwards into the grass.]

[This is new ground for both of them. Honestly, Varian hasn't got a single clue what he's doing. He usually tries to route at least some of his decisions (even the bad ones) in some carefully crafted science babble first. But this time he's utterly winging it and definitely didn't think very far ahead.

For a brief, horrible second, he thought he'd made a huge misstep. But then she kisses him back and he thinks maybe not. He only gets that momentary moment to relax though because then they've fallen on the grass and he lets out a soft 'oof', pulling back a little. Well. That was a disaster. He clears his throat awkwardly, blushing up a storm. ]

Um- s-sorry. That... that could have gone better.

[Ruby needs a minute to remember how to breath and function as a human being after that. She stares blankly at both him and the sky as he pulls back, her face about as red as her cape that she's lacking at the moment.

She blinks a few times after he speaks.]

Huh-Wha-blugh?!

[She shakes her head. She's back in reality.]

N-no! That was fine-good-really nice actually.

[Yep. Collapsing after your first kiss. She nailed that one.]

[Welcome back to reality, Ruby- it's one heck of an awkward place. Varian's been in something of a panic spiral, thinking he catergorically messed this up. So to hear she didn't hate it does at least get rid of some of the nerves. Some. He's still an awkward turtle, after all. ]

Oh-oh. [He does offer a nervous smile.] Thaaaat's good. Me too. Uh- that it was really nice. ...For me! Uh... obviously. B-because you already said it was nice for you. So it's nice that it's nice?

[Fucking poetry. ]

[Wow. What happened here since she zoned out? She doesn't remember it being so awkward before she left. Okay. It was pretty awkward but this is a whole new kind of awkward.

They had talked about kissing a few times. She just hadn't expected it to feel quite like that. It was nice and really fluttery and not at all what she had expected.]

Y-yeah. Great, uh- really-really nice. We're right here on the right track. Super swell.

[Jeez. She has no idea where to go with this. ...But part of her is a little curious about that feeling again. ...And well if Varian could give it a shot than so could she.

So she sucks in a breath, and with her shoulders still on Varian moves to try and pull him in so she can try giving him a kiss.

...Except she leads with her forehead which ends up smacking right against Varian's.

Ow. Ow.]

[They're doing so well. They're honestly doing perfectly. Great job, kids. ]

Super swell.

[He definitely wasn't ready for Ruby to go in for another kiss- he's still reeling from the first attempt- and all the weird, fuzzy, tingly feelings that came with it. As such, he isn't prepared when she leans up and is in no position to protect his poor head.

Ruby, that's where all the good stuff is, come on. He yelps flopping back off her, putting his hand to his head. Oh good. Black dots. Sometimes love literally hurts. He'll just lay in the grass for a second, don't mind him. ]

Ow. My skull.

[If it makes Varian feel any better Ruby isn’t in much better condition here. Her Aura wasn’t activated so she’s feeling the full brunt of that too. She yelps and curls up on her side, rubbing her forehead with both hands and kicking her feet in a frantic flurry.]

Ow ow ow! That didn’t go according to plan! Not at all!

[Sorry kids, you played yourselves.]

[Well. This is a disaster. He's just gonna keep lying there for a little while longer, it's fine.]

Give me a sec, I'm waiting for everything to stop being orange. Did anyone ever tell you that you have a really hard skull?

[Romantic. Still, he can't help but chuckle at the absurdity of it all.]

Wow. We're really bad at this.

[Ruby's cheating and starts to use her aura to start healing that her headache, but it's still going to take a second before she stops seeing stars.]

Don't worry. I'm in the same boat.

Y-yeah. Weiss, A lot of my enemies, Uncle Qrow, Yang, Dad. Probably some other people.

...Wait some of those might have been thick skull not a hard skull... Is there a difference?

[Look. That gets a laugh out of her too but she raises a hand to vaguely slap his way. ]

You're telling me...

That played out so much better in my head.

[That's SUPER cheating, Ruby!! Wow, rude!!! ]

Oh good, so long as you're aware.

[He tries to roll away from that slap but he doesn't really get anywhere. He deserved it anyway, a laugh bubbling out of him.]

I mean, in hindsight I could see where you were going with that? It was a good plan on paper. We just tripped at the last hurdle.

[As long as he doesn't see the flash of red around her forehead. It's all good.]

Painfully.

[She rolls over onto her back. She's starting to regain her senses so she just lets herself laugh along with him.]

I was just missing the diagram with where to aim. Better luck next time?

[She starts to pull herself up to her feet and offers him a hand.]

[He doesn't, she gets away with it. The perfect crime! He'll take that hand, allowing himself to be pulled back to his feet. At least the black dots have gone.]

Better luck next time. We should probably try something a little less injury-inducing. We can go ruin come carnies days if you like. I know how to beat a lot of rigged carnival games- which is about the only thing in this place I do recognise.

[She keeps her hand wrapped around his once she pulls him up. She likes the guy and doesn't want to let him go, so sue her.

Her expression brightens right up at the mention of the ruining the carnie games.]

You should have mentioned you recognized those sooner. It might have saved us a head injury in the long run.

[There's an awkward pause as she starts to walk toward the games. Letting Varian take point this time around.]

N-not that I didn't enjoy what happened before-but y'know.

[He is very much okay with still holding her hand. He slides his fingers between hers, giving her hand a little squeeze. This is actually fine.]

And let you miss out on a chance to traumatise me for the rest of my days? Pfft, nah.

[And, you know, the awkward kissing attempts. Those too. He leads her towards the carnival games, dropping his voice to a conspiring whisper. ]

Anyway. See the basket toss over there? It's figuring out how to use kinetic energy to your advantage. If you aim for the middle, all that energy is still in the ball, so it comes right back out. But if you hit it just on the top of the rim, that gets rid of it all and the ball will land right in the middle of the basket.

[She'll return that squeeze and let out a laugh.]

As long as you know what you're in for~!

[She leans in as he starts to explain the game to her. ...She can't help but feel her face start to heat up after having just been in such close proximity with him for that kiss. Luckily the bump on her forehead is enough to keep her focused.

She gives a small nod. Aim for the rim she could do that.]

Easy peasy, pumpkin squeazy. I've got this.

[She approaches the counter and slams her money down.]

We're going for the gold here!

I think I've got a good idea.

[He clears his throat, trying to dispel any remaining awkwardness. This is fine, he's fine, they got this. He grins as she slams her money down, well she's got moxie, he can give her that much.]

You've got this. You can win one of those... really creepy rabbits. Jeez.

[Do they even WANT to win a creepy rabbit? That's the question here. ]

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