) |
FERN |
Ooo slang part the second |
) |
FERN |
i think we just shared electrons, because i'm feeling a covalent bond between us |
) |
LANCE |
Pidge, I need your help. I gotta send a meme to Chloe but ... |
) |
DIPPER |
Hey Varian. You know those crazy alchemy bombs you used... |
) |
PETER |
Hey Varian, this is Peter. Um, Peter Graham. |
) |
USAGI |
Soooooooo~ How'd the date go? |
) |
MAKO |
Varianβ Checking in. |
) |
SHIRO |
i think one of us put a chicken patty in my toaster |
) |
EDDIE |
Hey. We need to talk. |
) |
MELIUS |
π»πΎ. πΌ ππππ πΎπ πππππ πππΎππΉ πΆππΉ πΎπ πΎπ πππ ππ½πππ |
) |
EDA |
Hey, kid. I... owe you an apology. |
) |
LUZ |
Valentines |
) |
MAUL |
I have a proposition for a project I think you'll be interested in |
) |
USAGI |
I LOVE YOU |
) |
FERN |
DUDE you still have your bandana! |
) |
BUZZ |
Morning. I heard from Fern you wanted to go out into the blizzard. |
) |
FERN |
dude your profile changed |
) |
USAGI |
Ruby told me about the breakup. |
) |
GLITCH |
Varian, I'm gonna go live somewhere else for now |
) |
MAKO |
A "nerd" is somebody smart... |
) |
MAUL |
Gifts |
) |
FERN |
heeyyyy quick question |
) |
FERN |
Christmas is coming up!!! |
) |
CHLOE |
god who the FUCK ever thought emojis were a good idea??? |
) |
KRISTOFF |
Varian,It's getting colder so I thought you could use this |
) |
FERN |
heyyyy Variable |
) |
RAPUNZEL |
okay not to put you on the spot but... |
) |
EDA |
Potion time |
) |
NEO |
Dude, I can mine antidote shit here! |
) |
GLITCH |
Got this in my basket. |
) |
EDA |
hey smart kid |
) |
TEN |
Hallo |
) |
ADAM |
Hey, k-- uh, Varian. I just wanted to check in |
) |
USAGI |
I'm sorry I worried you and fainted on you yesterday. |
) |
AMARA |
i lived, bitch |
) |
NEO |
Debatably good news, asshole |
) |
USAGI |
Hey Varian! It's Usagi |
) |
OSCAR |
I'm sorry, Varian. Tell me what you need |
) |
FERN |
a dark past huh |
) |
MAUL |
Varian. I am in great need of your assistance |
) |
FERN |
Varian VARIAN I CAN EAT FOOD |
) |
USAGI |
How much moon essence do you have? |
) |
USAGI |
VIVI-KUN, VIVI-KUN GUESS WHAT GUESS WHAT! |
) |
RICHIE |
well I promised |
) |
FERN |
A TOTALLY INCOMPLETE LIST OF OOO WORDS 'N SLANG |
) |
GLITCH |
VARIAN ARE THERE BUGS IN THE WATER?!
|
) |
USAGI |
To help with restless nights and the... |
) |
VIRA-LORR |
Little alchemist. I have a gift for you. |
) |
MARTIN |
Hi, Varian. This is Martin. I wanted to reach out... |
) |
USAGI |
Hi Varian, sweetie! I have a question for you. |
) |
GLITCH |
varian I need to talk to you. it's important. |
) |
USAGI |
I need you not to panic after what I tell you. |
) |
FERN |
dog you have so many vests |
) |
IRONHIDE |
HONK HONK |
) |
USAGI |
... I'm sorry I couldn't help you better, Varian |
) |
EMERALD |
Hey, V. Not that I care that much or anything... |
) |
FERN |
tell me when you're alive |
) |
FERN |
Varian i stabbed two people |
) |
AMARA |
hey weirdo i have something for you
|
) |
FERN |
is the Rapunzel in town your Rapunzel? |
) |
PENNY |
Salutations!! You do not know me, but my name is Penny Polendina |
) |
YANG |
Hey, is this Varian? I think we've met once before. |
) |
FERN |
hey can we talk |
) |
FERN |
you told ruby |
) |
MAUL |
Surviving another year is always an occasion worth celebrating |
) |
USAGI |
Hey I wanted to apologise |
) |
USAGI |
VARIAN-KUUUUNNN!!!! |
) |
FERN |
birth |
) |
MAUL |
Look what just arrived for me. |
) |
KATHERINE |
Do you want to get paid to make more purple goo things? |
) |
FERN |
ok i know you're good with plants but what about animals |
) |
FERN |
dog interested in means girls or guys |
no subject
[Clearly if she keep trying she'll just break his will down, right?
She glances back to Mr.Fluffers.]
Alright. You heard, Varian. You keep your mouth shut until we're ready to beat the answers out of you, you hear?
[Eyes shift back to Varian.]
That should keep him quiet.
[She goes over her their options briefly than nods.]
That normally wouldn't stop me, but we could always try something else and come back later.
[She looks over what they haven't tried yet. ...She doesn't really want to kill him with another face paced ride so she looks for something a bit more low key.]
Uh-... There's the Ferris wheel? ...I've never been in a tunnel of love before... Do either of those sound fun?
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Nope. And I'm sure that'll work. Thanks for making the rabbit even more terrifying than it already is.
[Maybe he'll just not sleep in... ever now. It's not really a big change from his normal life, anyway.]
True, but I'm pretty sure 'being kicked out of the theme park' is something we want to aim for around the end of the date. You know. For funsies.
[Guys, guys please. Varian looks up at the Ferris wheel, considers. ]
Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmnope I think I'm still good at avoiding anything that goes high still. I don't know what a tunnel of love is and I'm a little afraid to ask?
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[She didn't have any reason to doubt the rabbit yet at the very least. She shoves it closer toward Varian's face. She shifts it from side to side and in a creepy and cutesy voice she makes it say.]
Don't worry, Varian. I won't murder you! But you might die -----
--of fun! It'll be completely unrelated!
[She is not helping this at at all but she's trying.
She can't hold back a snort.]
Deal. We're definitely getting kicked out of her by the end of the night.
[She holds Mr.Fluffers in one arm and then wraps the other around Varian's shoulder as he refuses to go on the Ferris wheel.]
Okay. That's fair. No high fliers. Got it.
...Honestly I don't know what it is either. Never been in one before and didn't really care. It just seems like a date thing?
Might as well cross it off the check list?
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[It's better than dying from dropping from a great height which is still a pretty high likelihood for him back home. Still, he offers a wry smile.]
Great, that's a thing to aim for. I'm keeping a list of places I'm banned from. I wanna take out the roller skate rink next.
[Because everyone needs a hobby. He gives a soft hum, it makes logical sense. And he's sure it can't be too terrible, right? It just looks like a boat that goes into a tunnel.]
I mean, I think so? It sounds like it's a date thing? We should probably give it a try and if it's awful... well, lesson learned!
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Oh! -Uh- I just assumed from the big dopey grin and- Uh-
[Okay. She's got nothing for this one.]
How else is a big creepy bunny doll going to kill someone!?
[She's laughing at her own stupid routine when she pulls the rabbit back down.]
Is it still just the movie theater or have you managed to get yourself banned from anywhere else?
[Her eyes go wide with delight.]
We should definitely try out the roller rink next. That could be fun!
[She leads them along to the tunnel of love and... yeah it does look like it's just a little boat ride. Seems harmless enough.]
I've got like ten bucks on this thing being kind of awful. Those boats don't look they get any speed.
We might learn this lesson pretty quick.
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[Still, he sounds pretty amused- even with the threat of death looming from an adorable but insanely creepy bunny doll.]
Just the movie theatre at the moment. I wanna check out all the neon in the roller rink. See if I can jimmy any of it away so I can do some tests on it.
[Varian, no. Don't commit crimes. He walks with her, cants his head at the boat.]
Okay, I'll take that bet. I mean. I agree with you, but you never know. Maybe the tiny two-person boat going into the tunnel of ominous darkness in the horror-town amusement park might not be awful?
[He doesn't believe it, not really, not at all. Something is probably going to eat them. Still, he'll head to the boat, offering a hand he knows she doesn't need to get in but he's a goddamn gentleman. ]
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[She tilts her head and thinks about that for a moment. Then she gets an idea.]
Oh! That's a great idea! Imagine if we could get some neon and that in the warehouse! Death traps and robot fights in neon lights! That would be freakin' awesome!
Let's do it! Let's do it to it!
[Don't mind her casually agreeing to crimes.]
I'm going to be disappointed if there's no crazy two headed monster waiting to eat us in there.
[She's a simple girl of simple tastes, but she also doesn't mind being treated like a lady. So she'll accept Varian's hand and in her best Weiss impersonation that does involve plugging her nose she'll say. ]
Oh! Thank you, kind sir!
[And then she'll let herself get settled into the boat. Setting the terror rabbit behind her for the time being.]
no subject
See? We can make it look really special. I just need a little bit, to figure out how it works, and then I can replicate it.
[Ruby, only you would wish for crazy two-headed monsters. Can't they just have a nice boat ride? Is that too much to ask for?]
...That doesn't surprise me at all. And you're welcome, m'lady.
[He moves to sit beside her, casting the terror rabbit a look. Oh good, that's not gonna be creepy behind them or anything. The boat lurches off into the tunnel and they're met with... complete darkness. The boat just merrily sloshes in the pitch darkness for a few moments, occasionally bumping against the wall, when eventually Varian speaks up.]
Ok, Rubes, you're going to have to help me here, because I don't know if this is a from the past thing or a me thing or if this is generally just weird all round? Is- is this supposed to be romantic? I'm confused.
no subject
...Except it didn't show up. And they were just left in the dark.]
I'm going to level with you right now, Varian. I have no idea what's going on here.
Do people actually enjoy stuff like this?
[Don't mind her as she reaches her hand into the water and tries to paddle the boat along faster.]
Uh! Is anyone there!? I think the rides broken!
no subject
Maybe if they like sitting in the dark and doing nothing.
[He rummages around in his pockets, finally pulling out a small test tube. What? Everyone brings chemicals with them on dates, right? That's normal. He gives the test tube a shake, and it starts to glow luminous blue. He raises it a little, to get a better idea of their surroundings. ]
...Wow, we're literally just floating in an empty tunnel.
no subject
And who the heck would like that? Okay. Blake or Weiss might be okay with this but they aren't here.
[Ruby had tried to bring Crescent Rose along with her but her sister had insisted that she didn't. She's not sure what that was all about.
...She just stares at the blank and empty tunnel all around them as the light goes on.]
Seriously? Is the ride like just not finished?
This is literally the worst.
[She starts to shake the edges of the boat to make it rock back and forth.]
Like at least add in some waves or some rapids.
no subject
I don't know??? I don't understand the appeal of floating in a boat in the dark? What's romantic about this?
[He decides, seen as they're going to just float along in a boring tunnel and be bored, he might as well try and work out how the boat moves. It doesn't have an engine or anything. He leans over the edge to peer at the tracks just below the murky water at exactly the same moment Ruby decides to rock the damn thing. He manages a small, ungraceful 'urp' before he tips over into the drink as their little boat continues its merry way onwards.
Good job, Ruby, you killed him.
Except, you know, it's like three foot of water at most and Varian sits up, drenched. At least he managed to avoid the internal parts of the track- that could have been a depressing end to the date. ]
Oh, ugh this water smells like old engine parts.
no subject
Neither do I. Like they could have at least played a movie or something?
[Ruby stops shaking the boat when she hears the splash and looks back over toward where Varian had been sitting. Only to see that he's no longer there.
That's troubling.]
V-Varian!?
[She moves over to the other and looks over the edge to see him sitting there in the water as she slowly drifts away from him.]
Oh no! Boyfriend overboard! I'mma coming!
[Don't mind her as she leaps out of the boat to make a dramatic rescue. She lands in front of him with a big splash, and then slips on the bottom. She falls onto her back with an even bigger splash.
A second later her face emerges from the water as she just lets herself float there.]
It tastes gross too.
no subject
...Well. There goes our boat and that terrible, terrible rabbit.
[So now they're stuck in a dark tunnel, drenched in the grossest water imaginable, with only a tiny little glow stick to light their way. He tries to wring some of it out of his hair. ]
So. I guess we're gonna have to... walk our way out? Or we could catch the next boat?
no subject
Shhh! He might still be able to hear you. Did miss how big his ears are?
[She was definitely going to have to try and reclaim him at the lost and found later. She glances down along the tunnel, past the light and into the darkness.]
Might be better if we wait for the next boat. We can spook the people out of it and claim it for ourselves!
Like pirates!
no subject
I'll take my chances. And sure, Rubes. Like pirates. Really soggy pirates who don't want to spend the night in knee-deep gross water.
[He can hear the bot before he sees it, raising his little test tube and waves his free hand.]
Hey! Hi- uh, can we hitch a ride on your boat we feel out of-
[Oh. Okay, never mind, because there's a couple of teenager townspeople who are absolutely using the ride of its intended purpose, suddenly jumping apart like they've been electrocuted. Varian clears his throat awkwardly. Well. This is embarrassing.]
Ohhhhhhhhhhhhh. That's what this ride for.
no subject
See. I knew you'd understand. Commandeering a vessel from so no good land lovers is like pirating 101.
[She keeps a step behind him as he approached the boat. ...Her eyes go wide and she can't help but let out half gasp, half laugh at what they just saw.
...On the bright side the two teens had stopped doing what they were doing so Ruby feels no guilt as she climbs aboard and offers Varian a hand.]
Wow. Well- This is the part where Yang would make some kind of pun about booty.
Yeeeesh. Atleast we know for know for next time, huh?
no subject
[That is the driest, least pirate-y voice ever uttered. He didn't even try.
He does, however, snort about the booty comment because he's a sixteen-year-old boy and that's where his humour level is at sometimes. He takes Ruby's hand, clambering in next to her. Guess the mood has been ruined for two sets of teens today. He's not sorry, they're townspeople, they don't deserve to have fun anyway. ]
I mean, I still don't get it? You can't even see each other's faces. Besides, I really think we need to work better on our aim before we try this in the pitch black. I might take out one of your eyeballs.
no subject
I dunno? Maybe people like the danger of protentional concussions? Like an adrenaline high but for kissing?
Yeah. Practice makes perfect, right? I kind of like my eyes where they are right now.
no subject
I mean, sure, I guess? Still seems better ways to get around that. And yeah, I like your eyes just as they are too, they're perfect as is.
[He blushes, clearing his throat and looking at the ceiling. ]
Um- yeah.
no subject
[...Because honestly she didn't mind that all that much.]
Oh-Yeah-I mean I like them a whole lot. Your's aren't half bad either-you're teeth uh-really bring them out when you smile.
I mean if I was paying attention to things like that.
no subject
Y-yeah. It would be a surge of adrenaline coupled with norepinephrine and- stop talking me.
[He's seriously considering just... dunking himself back in the skank water. It would be better than all this awkward emotion screeching in his brain. At least it's dark enough that she probably can't see how much he's blushing. ]
Oo-oh. T-thanks, I think? [People don't normally find THE TEETH all that attractive.] And yeah, 'course.
no subject
Ye-ah. Big words and stuff.
[She has no idea what a norepinephrine is. Even if he explained it before it's gone in one ear and out the other.
She does thankfully miss all the blushing.]
No problemo-High praise. Like the highest praise I can think of at the moment-You should be super flattered.
no subject
[He probably has, in one of his awkward, rambling attempts to explain how she makes him feel because it makes more sense to him than "you give me the doki-dokis". ]
I am. Uh. Super flattered. Oh- look. Daylight. That's good.
no subject
[She looks back to the two Townies who do NOT look impressed with them in the slightest.]
Isn't that good news?
[Huh. The guy operating the machine doesn't seem impressed with them either.
...Does he have security guards with him.]
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