 "un/finished") |
FERN |
Ooo slang part the second |
|
FERN |
i think we just shared electrons, because i'm feeling a covalent bond between us |
|
LANCE |
Pidge, I need your help. I gotta send a meme to Chloe but ... |
|
DIPPER |
Hey Varian. You know those crazy alchemy bombs you used... |
|
PETER |
Hey Varian, this is Peter. Um, Peter Graham. |
|
USAGI |
Soooooooo~ How'd the date go? |
|
MAKO |
Varianβ Checking in. |
|
SHIRO |
i think one of us put a chicken patty in my toaster |
|
EDDIE |
Hey. We need to talk. |
|
MELIUS |
π»πΎ. πΌ ππππ πΎπ πππππ πππΎππΉ πΆππΉ πΎπ πΎπ πππ ππ½πππ |
|
EDA |
Hey, kid. I... owe you an apology. |
|
LUZ |
Valentines |
|
MAUL |
I have a proposition for a project I think you'll be interested in |
|
USAGI |
I LOVE YOU |
|
FERN |
DUDE you still have your bandana! |
|
BUZZ |
Morning. I heard from Fern you wanted to go out into the blizzard. |
|
FERN |
dude your profile changed |
|
USAGI |
Ruby told me about the breakup. |
|
GLITCH |
Varian, I'm gonna go live somewhere else for now |
|
MAKO |
A "nerd" is somebody smart... |
|
MAUL |
Gifts |
|
FERN |
heeyyyy quick question |
|
FERN |
Christmas is coming up!!! |
|
CHLOE |
god who the FUCK ever thought emojis were a good idea??? |
|
KRISTOFF |
Varian,It's getting colder so I thought you could use this |
|
FERN |
heyyyy Variable |
|
RAPUNZEL |
okay not to put you on the spot but... |
|
EDA |
Potion time |
|
NEO |
Dude, I can mine antidote shit here! |
|
GLITCH |
Got this in my basket. |
|
EDA |
hey smart kid |
|
TEN |
Hallo |
|
ADAM |
Hey, k-- uh, Varian. I just wanted to check in |
|
USAGI |
I'm sorry I worried you and fainted on you yesterday. |
|
AMARA |
i lived, bitch |
|
NEO |
Debatably good news, asshole |
|
USAGI |
Hey Varian! It's Usagi |
|
OSCAR |
I'm sorry, Varian. Tell me what you need |
|
FERN |
a dark past huh |
|
MAUL |
Varian. I am in great need of your assistance |
|
FERN |
Varian VARIAN I CAN EAT FOOD |
|
USAGI |
How much moon essence do you have? |
|
USAGI |
VIVI-KUN, VIVI-KUN GUESS WHAT GUESS WHAT! |
|
RICHIE |
well I promised |
|
FERN |
A TOTALLY INCOMPLETE LIST OF OOO WORDS 'N SLANG |
|
GLITCH |
VARIAN ARE THERE BUGS IN THE WATER?!
|
|
USAGI |
To help with restless nights and the... |
|
VIRA-LORR |
Little alchemist. I have a gift for you. |
|
MARTIN |
Hi, Varian. This is Martin. I wanted to reach out... |
|
USAGI |
Hi Varian, sweetie! I have a question for you. |
|
GLITCH |
varian I need to talk to you. it's important. |
|
USAGI |
I need you not to panic after what I tell you. |
|
FERN |
dog you have so many vests |
|
IRONHIDE |
HONK HONK |
|
USAGI |
... I'm sorry I couldn't help you better, Varian |
|
EMERALD |
Hey, V. Not that I care that much or anything... |
|
FERN |
tell me when you're alive |
|
FERN |
Varian i stabbed two people |
|
AMARA |
hey weirdo i have something for you
|
|
FERN |
is the Rapunzel in town your Rapunzel? |
|
PENNY |
Salutations!! You do not know me, but my name is Penny Polendina |
|
YANG |
Hey, is this Varian? I think we've met once before. |
|
FERN |
hey can we talk |
|
FERN |
you told ruby |
|
MAUL |
Surviving another year is always an occasion worth celebrating |
|
USAGI |
Hey I wanted to apologise |
|
USAGI |
VARIAN-KUUUUNNN!!!! |
|
FERN |
birth |
|
MAUL |
Look what just arrived for me. |
|
KATHERINE |
Do you want to get paid to make more purple goo things? |
|
FERN |
ok i know you're good with plants but what about animals |
|
FERN |
dog interested in means girls or guys |
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
droptheious) wrote2020-03-11 08:22 am
![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png){kind=small}
cawaii
no subject
[Varian will provide some colour commentary if Fern participates or not. It's just how he rolls. He gets the hell out of the way when she lunges, already pulling out a sticky bomb- launching at her to keep at least a few of those awfully spindly legs in place- she's still got PLENTY of reach, though as she stretches out and sweeps his feet out from under him as he tries to bolt to a safer distance. ]
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Okay, that's more than a few words. And Fern doesn't have any time to think about any of that anyways, because that centipede-woman is dangerous. She's way too fast for a lone human to take out head-on, and as he watches her knock Varian off his feet she snarls and lunges.
He slams into the centipede, interrupting her attack. She's still too quick though, catching herself with her legs and skittering out of range of his sword before he can get a hit in.]
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Though Fern might not have managed to get a good hit in, the distraction is enough for him to sit up, grabbing an ice bomb from his pack and tossing it her way. One half of her body freezes up - from the way she's screeching and struggling, it's not going to hold forever, but at least it should give Fern an opening.
Yay teamwork? ]
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He gets in close, at first trying to drive his sword directly into her for a quick killing blow. That... doesn't go so well, her shell covering is harder than steel and his blade bounces off.
Okay, fine. Plan B. He barely avoids an attempt from her to chomp down on his head, the ice keeping her (mostly) still starting to crack.]
Get more bombs ready!
[He needs her still so he can get a hit in, though he knows he can help a little with that. His next strike is aimed at where one her legs connects to her body, slicing cleanly through the opening between her shell-like armour.
Great, that works, so he ducks and dodges, trying to cut off a few more legs. She can't move if she doesn't have legs left to move with, right?]
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The carapace is too tough. [Thank you, captain obvious. ] Let me see if I can weaken it. You- you might wanna stand back.
[He grabs two bombs and hurls the first at her chest. Once again, ice blooms across it, freezing her in place- almost immediately after, Varian hurls some Flynnoleium at it. The resulting explosion is... quite the thing, and while impressive, it doesn't do a lot of damage- but it does, at least, create a crack in her armour- not a lot, but maybe enough for Fern to work with.]
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... And he hates to admit it, but he's totally impressed at how cool that explosion is. It makes his insides twist a little, and he has to push that feeling down to focus on the fight. When he sees the crack in her carapace he lunges in, slamming his blade into the opening. The centipede screeches as he cuts into her heart, and in her death throes she uses two remaining legs to shred into Fern's shoulder.
But it isn't enough, they've got her. She wails a few moments later, and collapses onto the ground. Removing his sword, Fern stumbles backward, keeping an eye on her body just in case this is a fakeout.]
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But then she injures Fern in her death throes and nothing else matters any more. He quickly moves over to Fern's side- not really caring how Fern reacts to it. If he lashes out, so be it. ]
Your shoulder- are you okay?
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... Still, he didn't get the satisfaction he usually does when he wins a fight. Probably because he couldn't do it own his own, he needed help from the person he wants to be far, far away from.
He tenses and looks away when Varian approaches.]
I'm fine.
[He isn't, obviously. He shoulder is a mess and now that they're out of danger his body is twitching and trembling with the strain of keeping him together.]
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Yeah, I don't know if you think I'm suddenly blind or something, but you this is obviously not fine. You're hurt. So- what can I do to help it? And don't say "nothing" or do that shutting me out thing because I am so past being in the mood for that.
[Farn could have got himself killed and that... well, that's a thought that hurts more than anything else. There are more important things at stake here. ]
So just let me help you, okay?
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I don't want your help!
[He can't stop himself from snapping that. Better than shutting down, right? He makes a frustrated noise, taking another step away, and another, until he's reaching the nearest tree so he can lean tiredly against it.]
I'm already humiliated, why do you wanna make it worse??
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I'm not trying to humiliate you! I'm trying to help you because you've been hurt. Because, hey, guess what, I still care about your wellbeing. Sorry if that doesn't fit in with this idea of yours that I don't- but it's the truth and you're just going to have to live with that.
[He hates this. He hates this so much. He's worked so goddamn hard on being a better person. On being a better friend, and it's still not enough. There's always somewhere he fails at- where he's not good enough. He's so damn tired of falling short of people's expectations of him. When will he be enough? Just... him?]
Look, I'm sorry that this didn't turn out the way you wanted it to. I- I can't just force feelings out of the blue like that. I didn't say it as some sort of attack on you. I mean, hell, you literally dropped that on me right after I told you I was dating Ruby. Like "surprise, here's some other stuff to mess with your head too, enjoy!".
[And he knows how Fern will react to this. He knows. He's lived in the self-loathing Fern does- most of him STILL lives in that mess. He's been slowly getting better, but he's nowhere near good yet. Not even close. ]
And this isn't me saying that you're a bad person or- or that you're not good enough or anything else you want to throw at me. I didn't even realise this was a thing until just now. I have a whole lot of stuff I need to process that I didn't even realise about myself and I could honestly live without being made to feel like the worst person ever because I don't know how to handle it yet.
[At some point, he realises he's been pacing and stops, folding his arms and heaving out a sigh. This is why he spends his time with adults back home. Other teenagers are complicated - he can bearly handle his own mess, let alone other people's. The anger at least fizzles out of him- gone as quickly as it came.]
You know what, fine. Hate me, ignore me, do... whatever you like. I'm sorry I'm not ready to... to deal with any of this right now. Girls, boys, both, I don't know. But will you at least for the love of god let me help you with your arm instead of letting yourself stand here injured in the woods? Because I will not be able to go through you dying again.
no subject
And then finally back to embarrassment because wow, he really can't do anything right, can he? Just about every single step he's taken today has been wrong, even the ones he was absolutely sure were right. The only thing he's done without completely screwing up was that fight, and now that it's over it's right back to making everything worse. Good job, Fern, good job.
His anger visibly dissipates by the time Varian has finished, replaced with a deeply mortifying shame. He doesn't even try to respond, he just stares at Varian for a few seconds longer before looking away.]
....
[Then he drops his hand from his shoulder, so that Varian can get a better look. It isn't the worst injury he's ever suffered, but there's been a chunk taken out and the torn grass still isn't knitting itself back together.]
no subject
He knows this because he'd do exactly the same thing, in Fern's position. They really are too alike and that... that's dangerous, sometimes. Still, Fern drops his arm and Varian lets out a slow breath. Okay, good.
He comes forward, gently taking hold of Fern's arm to take a look at it, trying to see why the grass isn't knitting together like it should. His brow furrows, concern evident in his features.]
Has it been doing this since you got back? Is it still a side effect of the death flu? Or has this happened to you before?
no subject
He still doesn't want any help but he knows that pushing Varian away even more will only make things worse, so he just keeps on looking away and letting him poke and prod and do whatever. The grass at the injury twitches and sharpens a little, though not enough to do more than a papercut and certainly not enough to get through Varian's gloves.
Fern just... tried to focus on answering those questions, like he's hearing them from Doctor Princess back in Ooo. They're very clinical.]
It's... probably a side effect. Whenever I die here I have a hard time not - .... [Geez, this is the worst.] - Not falling apart into a pile of grass for about a week. The only other time that's happened was my fight with - with Finn. And that's only 'cause his prosthetic arm had a rotating blade. And a 'fatality' setting.
[Because hearing some more details on how the fight that might have killed him back home is totally not a horrible thing to bring up right now of all times, and all.]
no subject
...And he used it on you? Way to be a psychopath, Finn. Wasn't a big fan already, great to know he's still the worst.
[He turns, rummaging in his backpack and pulling out a little vial. He looks at it for a moment, chewing his lower lip thoughtfully. Then, carefully, he shows it to Fern.]
Look. I've been working on something. It's... not much. Just some Nitrogen and Potassium, a touch of Phosphorous; it can help plants grow. I don't know if it would actually do anything for you. But it's worth a shot... you know... if-if you want.
[If you trust me is the unspoken part, there. Ever since Fern died, he'd been trying to find something, anything that might help Fern and his... specific needs. He wasn't human. It wasn't like a bandage or antibiotics. He had to think outside the box. ]
no subject
Fern hesitates.]
He... didn't mean to.
[That's said in the tone that screams the situation was way, way more complicated than that. They really need to sit down and write out that timeline one day.
Of course, now any hope he had of relaxing has been completely squashed now that's he gone and brought up Finn. It's going to take him a while to shove those feelings back down, too.
When Varian turns away he leans a bit more heavily against the tree, glancing down at his shoulder. He looks up to see the vial, confused. That's a very plant-specific mixture, and he's pretty sure Varian didn't come up with it because he took up gardening as a hobby.]
Uh. Alright.
[What else is he supposed to say? 'No, I don't want to try using the science potion you obviously made to help me'?]
no subject
[He picks up that tone, but chooses to bulldoze over it. That didn't sound like an accident- and he knows Fern's relationship with Finn is complicated at best. But this... this doesn't seem fair.
Still, bigger things to focus on. He nods, popping the cork off the cap. This was absolutely something he made with Fern in mind- he doesn't know if it'll work- Fern isn't exactly regular plants here. Still, he can work on it, improve it. Make something better.
He tips the concoction on Fern's arm and squints at it, waiting, studying, hoping it'll do something. ]
no subject
[That's a question for Bonnibel, honestly, and it's a whole entire conversation that's probably better to have when they aren't dealing with... everything else. Fern keeps himself from fidgeting as he watches Varian pour the solution onto his arm, not sure what to expect. He's used to Bonnibel's science experiments, so he at least isn't afraid of the possibility of this going horribly wrong.
A few moments pass as the grass absorbs the nutrients. Nothing seems to happen... but then the grass slowly starts to regrow, taking on a slightly healthier green as his shoulder knits itself back up. Still very loose, but it's a definite improvement.
Fern watches, feeling a little relief that he isn't going to have to worry about his injury on top of the deathflu. Less great is that he has Varian to thank for that, it's one more thing that's making him feel lower than dirt.]
Thanks.
[This is the worst. This entire day is just the worst. He shouldn't say anything, he should just shut up after that gratitude.]
Uh... sorry. For stuff. [Stuff, he's so stupid.] I... I really thought I was doing the right thing.
[Clearly he was dead wrong about that.]
no subject
He visibly relaxes as the solution works. Good. His thumb traces over the newly formed grass for a moment, checking it was holding. Satisfied, he shifts back a little, giving Fern his space back. A tired smile flickers across his face. ]
It's okay. You shouldn't have to worry about telling me how you really feel. I... didn't react well. [Story of his life. He rubs the back of his neck.] Look. Up until today I never even thought- well, I don't know. I thought "girls" was my only option but maybe it's not, but I just need to... figure that out. It's a lot to suddenly realise, y'know?
[The signs were always there. but he'd ignored them- because of course, he had. His romantic life prior to coming here was a crush on a woman who was much too old for him and was absolutely not interested in indulging in the puppy crush of a fourteen-year-old boy. ]
And I'm still trying to work out... everything with Ruby and I guess it's just... a lot, right now. All at once. [He lets out a self-deprecating chuckle] In case you haven't noticed, I'm really not good with people anyway, so this is a whole mess of confusion for me right now. And that's on me. Not you.
[He offers a smile, a little smaller this time.]
Look, I'm sorry I can't give you what you want right now - and frankly, you could do better anyway. I don't know... I think I need time? Just... time. And if you don't want to speak to me again because of that, that's fine. I get it. It hurts. You
[Rejection. When you've put your heart down on the line. ]
But you're still one of the most important people in my life, no matter what, okay? None of this changes that. Not ever. I just... I miss having my best friend around, y'know? I understand if you don't want that, or if it's not enough. [The terrible, poisonous voice in the back of his mind reminds him he's never going to be enough for anyone. It takes the wind out of his sails somewhat, so he finishes a little lamely.] But...yeah.
no subject
He's still feeling uneasy and like a total wreck, even when Varian forgives him. The whole 'girls only' is baffling, but explains one or two things. And honestly, that kind of limitation has to really suck. No wonder he reacted the way he did. This isn't going the way he had been hoping, but it's marginally better than how they were both dealing with this earlier. He reaches up, absently rubbing the antler tattoo on his right arm.
Okay... okay, he's disappointed, but he isn't emotionally devastated. He can do this. He can try to not completely screw this up again.]
Time's... good. Time's better than - [Outright rejection this very second, though he can't bring himself to say that aloud. He can barely hold back a wince. He... also probably needs some time.]
You're important to me, too. [He instantly feels dumb for saying that too, though he at least feels like warrants reiterating with the self-loathing he's noticed creeping into Varian's words. Guess they're both feeling like garbage right now, that shouldn't be surprising. The least he can do is try to be reassuring, though he knows from previous experience how awful he is at that.]
I don't want to shut you out. [He's managing to sound firm about that, though as he continues he falters.] I just - do that, when stuff gets too hard for me to deal with. It isn't you.
[He's just as big a failure at people as you are, Varian. Don't worry.]
no subject
...Yeah.
[That's both to his admission of his importance and the acknowledgement that time's... good. He needs to hear it, to know he matters. It's desperate and sad and he knows it. Is it fair to Fern to be like this? He doesn't know... probably not. But he needs it. To be important. Relevant. ]
...I can get that. And I appreciate it. I'll... I don't know. Is it easier to just give you your space? I don't want you to think I'm turning my back on you for that. Because I'm not.
no subject
... But then there's that need to cling, and despite what Varian says there's the instinctive fear of being abandoned. Having to suffer through that, even if it's only a paranoid possibility in his head, seems worse than everything else, honestly.]
I don't know. At this point it'd probably feel weirder if you did. Pretty sure I'd just miss you.
[And wind up feeling even worse, so whatever he can do to mitigate that seems like the best plan. That doesn't mean the same applies to Varian though, and he can imagine 'needing time' also means 'needing space.']
... What about you?
no subject
[He has been missing Fern, desperately and horribly. Not the same way Fern has been missing him, it turns out, but missing all the same. He doesn't want to lose Fern out of his life completely. That... that would be a miserable time, he's sure.]
I mean, I still want to hang out. You're my friend and honestly, it's sucked a whole lot not having you around. I haven't liked it one bit. Nope.
no subject
It's been the worst. [He isn't really exaggerating, either.
He makes a noise akin to a sigh, finally pulling away from the tree.]
You... wanna head back to town?
no subject
Sure, let's get outta here before any more creepy bug ladies show up.
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