Varian (
droptheious) wrote2022-04-30 07:37 pm
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Varian
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[So there!!
He does raise an eyebrow at Varian's reaction. He wasn't really expecting that kind of reaction. To care more about the psychological rather than the... well calling a healer part. Varian really was a sweet person. ]
Oh, Ryouta was fine. He found the whole thing hot, somehow. [TRULY, A STUPID MAN]
I freaked out. Nearly took a vow of celibacy, had Ryouta not talked me down from it. [He sighs. In other words, this would've been a compression thing, had Ryouta not been there] I just don't want to have a repeat of the incident. Especially when you're...
[He trails off, trying to find a polite way to put "you're a scrawny nerd unlike Ryouta"]
... Well, you and Ryouta are different people.
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[He will concede to this. He supposes.
Varian's learned that healers are great and all but they sure as hell can't fix what goes on in your noggin after something potentially traumatic happens. That's where the real kicker is. He makes a soft 'eh' sound about Ryouta finding it hot, making a little scale motion with his hands. Varian would not have had a puppy crush on a terrifying sword lesbian if he didn't at least vaguely entertain the idea he'd like to be stepped on sometimes.
But as Jun continues to speak, it's clear to Varian his worries were founded correctly. Ah, there it is. The compression.]
I mean... you know it wasn't really your fault, right? It just happened. Things happen.
[And wow, wow. Varian lets out a faux gasp, putting a hand on his chest.]
What are you trying to say. [At least the offence is only a jest, as he lets out a snort of laughter.] I mean, I'd prefer if you didn't snap me like a twig in all honestly. [He lets out a thoughtful hum.] Well, I've never been afraid of pushing back at you so far. I can at least guarantee that if it gets too much, I'll tell you. Does that help?
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I mean, it's not like I'm beating myself up every night about it. [That's... something? But he frowns a little, because he knows what Varian's saying is hitting a deeper thread than just one little incident. There's a long pause as he tries to figure out how to word it all.] ... It's complicated. The first half of my life I was raised to be a weapon, and then the second half of my life my dad taught me to be a pacifist and try to blend in with human society. So even if logically I know something's a accident... getting my feelings to believe that is another matter.
[God he hopes that makes sense, since he's not that good at understanding his feelings, much less vocalizing them. He's worked on it in therapy, but he knows he's a long way off from nailing it.
But... he considers that, before nodding. Thats true. Varian's never backed down from an argument in his entire life. Of course he'd share his opinion. His shoulders relax a little, he hadn't realized how tense they are]
...Yeah, it does help. [He nods] Maybe some phrase so I don't confuse it with our normal banter?
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He waits patiently for Jun to work thought his feelings, and even more so when he tries to voice them. He knows Jun well enough to know the guy would much rather bury everything away and not talk about it at all, so the fact he's trying is a big deal.
He's never been in a position where he's felt like a weapon himself (most of his actions came from a place of anger and hurt, no one had to mould him that way - bar Andrew) but he remembers what Jun has said about Krusnik in the part. It breaks his heart to think of anyone being treated that way, but even more so when it's someone who matters so very much to him.
He smiles gently, reaching out to rest a hand over one of Jun's, giving it a reassuring squeeze and keeping it there.]
So it's like what you've known in the past is at war with what you know now? I mean, that's understandable- they couldn't be more contradictory. It makes sense that it'd worry you, like... struggling which side of you to lean into when... I mean, honestly, it's probably more down the middle than anything, yeah?
[He gives Jun's hand another squeeze.]
That's okay. Thank you for telling me. [Because he WILL encourage Jun choosing to speak about what's going on in his head every time.] I think that's... more than fair to struggle with.
[He notices the tension easing and is glad of it.]
Okay, we can do that. That's totally doable.
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But he did want to try. Especially after Varian opened up so much about himself. Jun never would asked him about his past, but Varian volunteered it. Forced himself to share. How could he not make an effort in return?
He listens to Varian's assignment about it, giving a small nod]
... Mm, it's something like that. [He didn't want to be just a weapon like Krusnik wanted, but he never really fit into normal life like his father hoped he would. Somewhere down the middle was a good way to describe it.... though Jun can't help but scrunch his nose in a self-deprecating matter as he jokes] Pretty cliche of me to struggle with yet another binary huh?
[Because get it? Get it? Okay, not his best. He does give a bit of a smile as he squeezes Varian's hand]
... Thank you for listening. [And understanding. He'll let that smile come, not wanting to linger on such a heavy topic]
Aha, sorry. I didn't mean to kill the mood with some heavy talk, I really was just trying to assess which base we were reaching tonight.
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He snorts a little at the scrunched up nose - reaching out with his free hand to boop if gently with his finger.]
Why stop at what you're good at, huh?
[It's fine, he gets the joke. It landed.]
Literally any time. I meant it when I said I was always here to listen.
[He shakes his head, gently pulling up Jun's hand to his lips, pressing a little kiss on the knuckles, before glancing up at him.]
You didn't kill the mood. It's okay. [He is 18 years old, the building being on fire would not kill the mood for him. He might trying to be sensibly not letting his hormones take the wheel the whole time, but they're still leaning on the horn. His lips turn into a little smirk.] Two? Two feels like a good number.
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Hehe, good point. I do like being an enigma.
[... He looks completely charmed as Varian kisses his hand. He'll lean over to kiss Varian's forehead in return]
And I'm always here to listen to you too.
[Whether it be about Varian's past, his present, or just whatever topics are on Varian's mind. He wanted to be there for that.
But thank God. The mood wasn't killed. He wanted to be careful about this, avoid any past mistakes but... boy, being here with Varian sure is reminding him that it's been awhile ]
Two? As in second base? Well... okay! That's...uh... [... Excuse him as he pulls out his phone from his pocket with his free hand and does the world's FASTEST google search.] Hold on- I'm sure it's pretty safe though. 2 isn't very high-
[The search comes up. His eyebrows raise at the results]
.... Heavy petting and touching over clothes. Huh. For second base?
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I never would have guessed!
[It's a gentle tease and his smile softens at Jun's reassurance- and the little kiss on his forehead, that was nice.]
Thank you, I know. I really appreciate that.
[Because good lord, if he didn't need it sometimes, too. Being able to unload his past onto Jun and not having it ruin everything has been significantly comforting. It's given him a safety net he sorely needed.
He sits back while Jun googles that, absently playing with the other boy's fingers in his captured hand. He considers the results.]
To be fair, I existed before baseball did, I'm mostly guessing. [Varian will use that as an excuse as many times as he can get away with, regardless of the fact he's lived in the modern world for over two years at this point. Still, he gives a thoughtful hum.] I'm okay with that, I think. I mean, probably a lot for two people on a first date who barely know each other. But we've known each other for a long time now.
[He smiles, leaning in to press a kiss at the crook of Jun's jaw.]
So, yeah. I'm okay with that... uh, if you are. I mean, I trust you, so-
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[He knows you, nerd. A sport and a team one at that? The only way Varian is playing that is if it's by force.
When he's done reading on the phone, he'll set it on the coffee table. No need to keep holding onto that. He gives a little shrug as he turns his attention back to Varian. With the hand being held, he'll move his thumb to trace along Varian's skin.]
Oh, I'm okay with it. I guess I just always thought the bases escalated slower...like first base was hand-holding or something. [But he gives as coy little smile] But that's alright. How about I take lead and go until you say stop?
[.... That is the smile of a guy that totally plans to be a tease throughout this]
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[Because Varian really will avoid all sports - especially team ones. God, no. Just let him die instead.
There's a tingle of excitement as Jun's thumb brushes over his hand- especially added with that smile. Varian is vaguely aware that he's setting himself up for something here, but he has no intention of pulling away yet.]
Hah, guess I never thought about it before. [His smile turns a little more lopsided, his heart beating a little faster in anticipation.] Yeah, okay. I'm very okay with that.
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[Also vaguely unethical treatment of the gopher, but now that they're getting back into it, the last thing Jun wants to do is derail things with a discussion of rodent handling ethics.
So instead he gives a wink with his coy smile ]
Alright, leave it to me then.
[He'll draw close to him again, pulling him into another proper kiss. This time, he'll take lead, guiding the kiss into being deeper than the ones before. His free hand meanwhile will move to the side of Varian's head, fingers moving into his hair and the thumb tracing along his ear lobe]
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Nope. There's only one thing he's interested in right now.
He happily follows Jun's lead into the deeper kiss, the butterflies in his stomach working overtime as he makes a soft noise into it, savouring the taste of Jun's lips. He shifts closer, very much enjoying the feel of Jun's fingers in his hair, of his thumb playing along his ear. He gives Jun's hand a little squeeze of encouragement to keep going on whatever track he's headed down here. It's extremely welcome.]
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So he'll keep it up. His tongue slips out of his mouth, poking at Varian's lips to try to get into his mouth as the kiss continues. All while he's doing that, he'll get up and carefully climbs onto Varian's lap. His knees will move to rest on the couch on either side of Varian, so he's not actually putting any weight on him- but it certainly makes it a whole lot easier to close the distance between them. ]
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He shifts a little as Jun climbs onto his lap, so he can settle easily between Jun's thighs- he releases Jun's hand so one can settle, palm down, at the small of Jun's back, the other moving up to the back of his head to tangle in the green hair at his neck. ]
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Eventually he has to break for air, ending the kiss. But he then moves to start kissing the corner of Varian's mouth, speaking between kisses.]
Taste any of that copper and tellurium you were asking about, Professor Larch~?
[He says that in a lightly teasing tone, because of course he's not letting go of that bad science pun from earlier. He makes a hum of approval at the feeling of Varian's hands, tilting his head so Varian can easily reach his hair. Meanwhile own now free hand will slide onto Varian's chest, fingers brushing over the fabric of his shirt. ]
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Maybe~ But you know what they say in science, Professor Olive, you really do have to test things out multiple times to be sure.
[He deserves the teasing, it was a terrible flirting attempt, and he knows it, but if he can turn that to his advantage he sure as hell will. Varian takes advantage of Jun's tilted head to thread his fingers through his hair, he's pretty sure Jun can feel his heart absolutely thundering in his chest with his hand where it is- but it's a feeling Varian wants to keep chasing.]
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Mm, don't worry. You'll get many opportunities to test that out. [on the next kiss, he'll gently scrape his teeth against Varian just to see the reaction] But right now, I'm the one running the experiment.
[Well, Varian said he liked being stepped on.
He can feel that thundering heart, and honestly? It's a rush, enough that he finds himself resting his palm there for a moment to feel it. He knows that his own heart must be beating just as fast]
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H-hah is that the case? Good to know, I'd hate to miss out on more of that.
[As Jun's teeth scrape against his neck, Varian's breath catches, his synapses on fire. Oh. Well, he's sure learning new and interesting things about himself today, he liked that a lot. He mutters something in German that is absolutely not a nice word as his fingers tangle a little tighter in Jun's hair.]
Okay. Good- good experimenting. Carry on.
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Oh~? Did you like that?
[He'll do it again, this time taking his time as he slowly scrapes his teeth over Varian's skin, before following it up by soothing the spots with his tongue. ]
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It takes him a minute to find words again, his Adams apple bobbing as he catches his breath.]
Uh huh, yup. M-more of that, please.
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Haha, as you wish ~
[He'll go in for it again, kissing at Varian's neck. Though this time, instead of just a tooth scrape, he'll start to carefully fully nip at his skin, biting it in a way that'll probably leave a mark later.
All the while, his hand starts to move down his chest. This time he's using his nails against the fabric, as he lightly scratches down his chest. ]
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For now, he focuses on the feel of Jun biting his neck, gasping out his name breathlessly. Oh, he knows that's gonna leave a mark, but he's perfectly okay with that if it means Jun keeps doing that.
He arches a little, pressing into those nails against his shirt- he's starting to realise he probably signed himself for a lot of teasing tonight, and that is absolutely on him.]
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Now that was a reaction. You sounded really hot just now.
[He'll glance up at him, with a coy look on his eye]
Do you wanna keep going?
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Don't know what you expected, doing that to me.
[ That grin and the coy look are enough for Varian to reach out to grab the front of Jun's shirt, pulling him in for a fierce kiss, he pulls a little at Jun's lower lip when he breaks it, lowering a sharp gaze on him.]
Don't you dare stop.
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Alright alright! I was hoping you'd say that.
[He'll grin before pulling Varian back into another kiss, making it passionate and deepens it to try to take control of it. He'll scoot in closer as well, so his body is pressed up against Varian's ]
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